Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Hello everyone. Just wanted to give a quick introduction of myself. My name's Theo. I'm 33. I live in New York, the Bronx specifically. I used to work with Maisha back in Philly before coming to the glorious New York Post. Home of the unsubtantiated news story and the thinly veiled racist screed. But I'm a graphic designer in sports so I KIIIIIINDA get a pass. Well at least I hope I do. Fuck it. I get a paycheck.

I was excited to get an invite to join this little sliver of goodness but was at a loss for what to contribute. But I think it came to me this morning when I was half dreaming/half awake. For some reason I was yelling at myself to get going. I mean I was going hard. I felt like a drill sergeant. "Get up you dumb bastard! Move! What are you scared to move? I bet you'd like to stay in that bed you punk ass! You like snuggling into that pillow, puddin'?!?" Just uncalled for, early morning type stuff.

But you know, it got me up. I mean it more than woke me up. It got my HYPE! I damn near did a kick flip to my feet followed by a James Brown split. And it got me to thinking. What do other people's inner motivational voices sound like? I mean if someone else ever woke me up like that or tried to spur me on with those words, I guarantee that I'd never do what was demanded of me. But I know me and daresay enjoy berating myself into action. I thrive on it. But I could never do it to another person since I know it's some weird shit to have fly outta your mouth. So with all that...what does your inner drill sergeant sound like? Is it even a drill sergeant? Is it a polite grandmother promising you a slice of pie? Is it a hot ex promising you some alone time? And by the way, not all my posts will be nutty. I just had this on my mind for a few hours.


  1. um, i am lying in bed still rubbing ozzie's tummy, which means my inner drill sergeant is off in miami having a margarita.

    i wish. hm, my early morning motivation is a mental picture snowball effect. i'll be happy, then i think ... gotta pee. i ignore that, then ... what about that affidavit? put that off for a minute, then suddenly thirty minutes until carpool takes off. do i have a shirt to wear? eat breakfast at home this morning. apply for the grad PLUS loan. paul wants my spreadsheet this afternoon. gotta copy those letters. when can i vacuum the carpet? god, i need to do laundry.

    i wind up rolling out of bed just to shut my head up. i mean, if i'm moving, i don't think about everything i have to do. i just do it ...

    i want to know who gets the polite grandmother. 'cause damn, i want her in my head, instead. :)

    hugs to you, theo!

  2. I'll be your polite granny Mish! Here's a 5 dollar bill for your birthday!

  3. For me it depends on the day, such as did I just work 21 hours straight and then sleep for 4 hours. In those instances is very simple “ must get up, need coffee”. Others its mostly what do I have to do for the day, need coffee, got to pee, more along the lines of what Mai was saying.

    Sometimes there is no real persona for the inner dialog. Other times it might be recalling my mother when I was in high school yelling from the bottom of the stairs “Ashley, time to get up, breakfast is ready!” there is also recalling the sequence of events how and lover would whisper in my ear and kiss you softly to wake me in the morning. I would lie in bed reliving those moments and wishing that there was more time to stay in bed and daydream.